Tuesday, November 04, 2008

Of Mice And Men

Have you ever lived in a rodent infested home? I have. This was years ago yet the memories, when they come, cause traumatic stress syndrome complete with all the symptoms I suffered at the time. Laying in bed at night I can still hear the critters running up and down inside the walls. My imagination is so finely tuned that I can hear their little feet scurrying about... Putta put putta put put....Shhh! Just the slightest rustle when in this mind set can result in me deciding to hold my bladder until morning. Shadows on the floor transform themselves into dark creatures with little but sharply pointed teeth. They lay in wait.

I used to be brave, really and truly brave. When nature called in the night I would venture forth and answer that call and never gave it a second thought. One night while sitting on my throne, half conscious, in the dark and hand forward searching the air in front of me for that ever illusive end of the roll something ran over my foot. My heart stopped in my chest. I forgot to breath. I sat very still. It ran over my foot again!
SCREAM
SCREAM SOME MORE AND LOUDER
SCREAM LIKE I AM BEING MURDERED!!!

Footsteps running. Light blinding me. Husband pale. Husband swearing. Husband threatening me. "For crying out loud it is just a little mouse. What in the name of Dog do you think that mouse is going to do to you! If you ever do that again I will...I will Oh! For pity sake I WILL! You scared the crap out of me." Scared the crap out of him? I went to the dresser and handed him a pair of clean underwear. Now if looks could kill I am living proof that they don't I would not be here telling my tale today.

5 comments:

The Invisible Mo said...

Hilarious, but all too real after my little escapade the other night with the screaming rodent! haha. I think I must have hit on his entry point because since I put up the kickplate to the cabinets he hasn't been back. What is it about mice that makes us scream and run? I keep telling myself:
They are just little furry animals. They are just little furry animals.
It doesn't work.
And to think I used to own a pet rat. Who knew?

Christine said...

Oh my goodness. YOU OWNED A PET RAT? They are worse than mice in my brain. I can look at a mouse from a safe distance but even looking at a rat curls my hair.

Eve said...

I don't know as our house was rodent infested, but we lived across the street from an open field where grain was grown each summer. When the weather turned bad all the little miceys started looking for warmer digs for the winter. Some of them invariably made our house their own. We used a lot of D-con and got rid of them fairly quickly. But I can relate to not wanting to wander in the dark. lol

Sue said...

Do you remember the house trailer we lived in On Marv's parents farm. Totally mouse infested! I could hear them in the walls and they would run around the house all the time. I couldn't get out of there soon enough.

Fluffy said...

Have I got a cat for you! My old house was filled with mice when I moved in. Within one week, Mom Cat had them all cleaned out. I saved on cat food, too.