Saturday, August 30, 2008

Spontanious Human Combustion

I think I have solved the mystery! I am just about sure that any persons who have combusted have most likely been recent customers of Future Shop and had to have dealings with their customer services department. Simply making a purchase there will not do it. They are very prompt and courteous taking your money. Once they have your money...well things rapidly change!

At customer pick-ups: John and Chris wait patiently. After a while they realize that all service personnel are ignoring them, even the young pup who manages to look busy simply standing there. Chris takes a couple of steps closer to the said young pup. He does not acknowledge her. He makes no eye contact with her. Chris is amazed because at this point she is only a foot and a half away from him. She has definitely invaded his body space. "Excuse me?" politely spoken. Still no repose is shown from the pup. A little more volume must be needed. Perhaps he is hearing impaired. "EXCUSE ME?" still polite even through she added volume. Ahh...he looks up. "Could you tell me where we should be waiting to pick up our computer?" He directs John and Chris to the customer service line and advises them that one of the girls there would be happy to get their computer for them. They go and stand in line there and wait for their turn. One of the customer service reps keeps punching at her keyboard. She does not seem to be representing any customer. Chris wonders if that girl is engrossed in a game or something. The customers would be clueless wouldn't they? The clerk does not acknowledge anybody. She doesn't lift her head and smile and say: "I will be with you in just a moment. Sorry to keep you waiting" Finally John and Chris are told: "I can take you down here" They go there and ask her if she can get their computer. The gal says "No" Chris stood there and blinked for a couple of seconds. "Umm...that young man over there told us to come over here to get our computer. He said that you would be happy to do this for us" I must explain...the door to the place where our computer had been loaded up and custom configured for a nominal fee of 100 dollars was maybe 15 steps away from her. We could see the technicians in there industriously working away, so near yet so far. "Where should we be?" Chris inquired. The clerk indicated that the couple should go and wait exactly where they had waited in the first place. Chris informed the service representative of this. The rep snapped: "I can't help have a nice day." She promptly broke all eye contact in order to dismiss the poor couple and immediately became engrossed in perhaps a bug that had landed on her computer screen. Have a nice day? Are you kidding me? John and Chris returned to where they were at the start. The same young pup is still standing there. John and Chris waited there for awhile. He does not acknowledge them. The entire previous performance is repeated verbatim. That young pup instructed John and Chris: "Go over to that counter." He points the poor abused couple over to the counter where they had parted with their money the day before. Earlier there had been no customers lined up and there had been no staff in attendance either. That is where the personnel who work the floor bring customers to take the money. That is the only reason for any staff to be at that counter. Waiting there for service is futile as usually nobody is there. At this time there are about twenty people lined up. I point this out to the young pup. By now my voice is starting to be a little desperate. I say: "There are twenty people there now! You actually expect me to meekly go over there and wait in line simply because you said to? I want my computer now and I want you to go and get it!" He turned and walked about 7 steps to the door that accesses the technician room and called one of the technicians out to see us. That guy got us our computer. That was how simple it really was.

As I write this I have noticed that my fingers were starting to smoke and smolder. I have gone to the kitchen sink and extinguished them a couple of times. I feel that my internal temperature has been elevated by this experienced. I hope I do not combust. Perhaps I should go to the Coop and get an iced cappuccino. I think that Future Shop should have to have warnings posted outside their store. It should go like this:

Warning: Our customers are at a greater risk of spontaneous human combustion than the rest of the population! Have a nice day.


Becky said...

I hate that place. I've told you this before. Their customer service is the worst in history and so I refuse to ever by from there again in case I have a problem and I have to deal with their customer service.

I still have the last receipt I ever got from them. You want to know what the receipt number was?


I'm not making that up.

Fluffy said...

This goes on for several days. Finally, the bartender shouts, "If you ask me that again, I'm going to nail your beak to this bar!." And the duck leaves. The next day, the ducks walks into the bar and he says, "You got any nails?"

I was so tired the other night I couldn't think.

I have never gone to a store and bought a computer. I go online and have it delivered. I can't stand those people.

Bientje said...

They must have been trained to ignore people. It must be hell working in that kind of shop, trying desperately to ignore everyone, don't you think?
I can imagine you going into spontaneous combustion! I would be just the same! We have a shop like that here as well! Very big and very attractive, but there service department is down in the basement and customer service sucks. The only thing that interests them is selling and making money... not reparing things, oh no!

Christine said...

Why does the duck want nails????

Christine said...

I had forgot about the service problems until I was waiting in line. I had better check the number on my receipt! LOL

Margaret said...

The duck doesn't want nails. He wants a beer. He goes into the bar day after day asking for a beer and the bartender tells him day after day that they don't serve ducks in this bar. Then the story continues in Fluffy's comment. ???

Anyway, I was getting all stressed just reading your story. I also will never buy anything there. The same goes with the Brick.

Sandy C. said...

Whoa. I'm so sorry this happened. I would have lost my mind. I'm so glad you spoke up in the end.

Christine said...

I want a beer.

Trav said...

lol auntie chris... i love your responses.... you make me laugh.... i went to future shop for the stereo in my truck and had nothing but a glorious time there, tho, i never had to deal with any of the little pukes up at the front of the store... hmmmm

Christine said...

Oh no...don't get me started on the Brick!

Sue said...

After reading this I want to go give them a piece of my mind. TThanks for the reminder not to shop there.

I love your comment Becky!